A forum for family, friends and carers of pancreatic cancer patients

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Slewis7313
Posts: 688
Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:48 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Slewis7313 » Tue Jun 03, 2014 8:41 am

I hope all goes well today Sue and this will be a bridge to build on moving forward with your Mother's treatment. It is so frustrating with the drinks and would seem to show a fundamental lack of understanding of certain aspects of Pancreatic Cancer. When I was losing weight in the early days, my Oncologist and Dietician were very clear that I should eat whatever it took to assist with the weight, including lots of sugary foods. Hopefully this week will see some improvements for your Mum.

Steve
X

Cathy
Posts: 788
Joined: Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:43 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Cathy » Tue Jun 03, 2014 11:49 am

Hi there

I wonder if the concerns are over diabetes - a common side effect of PC.

I ask as Jonathan's GP raised this with us when I went to collect a prescription for them. He was diabetic but we got them in the end without too much bother.

Sue, suggest emailing the nurses on here as there is a range of high calorie suppliments that she could ask for.

Good luck

Cathy xx

Sueoliver
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 8:22 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Sueoliver » Tue Jun 03, 2014 9:52 pm

Mum's op went well the procedure was done through her side as they couldn't do it the other way. She actually seemed brighter tonight as if it was a relief that they had managed to insert the stent.
I just want my mum back to how she was and I want to see a smile on her face!
Thank you to everyone on this supportive forum . sue x

Slewis7313
Posts: 688
Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:48 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Slewis7313 » Wed Jun 04, 2014 5:12 am

Really pleased it has gone well. I can understand it must have been such a worry for your Mum (and you of course).

Steve
X

LMD
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Apr 15, 2014 10:06 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby LMD » Wed Jun 04, 2014 3:56 pm

Hi Sue
Glad to read that your mum seemed brighter and that the stent op went well. Fingers crossed for you both that things improve now..X

Sueoliver
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 8:22 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Sueoliver » Thu Jun 05, 2014 5:10 pm

I thought I would feel so happy today after my mum seemed brighter! They kept her in hospital as she was sick yesterday . Went to pick her up today and she was so quiet and low. She said she was sore , but it seemed more than that! She wouldn't even come to my house and sat in the back of the car as she said the roads are too bumpy and she can't stand being jolted!
The pancreatic specialist nurse said she would visit her and didn't and now the hospital have told her to chase the nurse and oncology up! Surely that is not right.
I can't believe the change in her since diagnosis on the 20th May. Has anyone else seen this? It is as if her generation hear the word cancer and automatically give up!
What can I do?
Sue x

Fifi

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Fifi » Sat Jun 07, 2014 7:07 pm

Pleased it went well for her. I know from experience that depending on how the patient feels, depends on how we feel. I am sure that when your mum is low, you feel it for her and I know how hard those feelings are.

I agree, these people SHOULDN't have to be chased, but they do. It is so exhausting to get people to care.

Has been a few days since you posted, really hope things have improved a little for you both.

xx

LMD
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Apr 15, 2014 10:06 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby LMD » Sat Jun 07, 2014 8:32 pm

Sue
Just wondering how things are? How is your mum and how are you?
Thinking of you
X

Sueoliver
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 8:22 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Sueoliver » Sat Jun 07, 2014 9:14 pm

Thankyou so much for asking I really appreciate it. I am so scared for her. She is a completely different person. Still not eating, won't go out, said she doesn't feel like visitors (she has lots of friends) not even ringing me up any more. I went round today and she was so quiet, yesterday she took herself to bed for a few hours!
Is this normal?
Her oncology appointment has come through for 10a.m on Thursday. To be honest I am dreading it!
The support on this forum is fantastic and I thank you all for that .
sue x

Judith44
Posts: 2
Joined: Fri Jun 06, 2014 9:25 am

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Judith44 » Sun Jun 08, 2014 11:05 am

Hi Sue, She is so lucky to have you as her help and support at this nightmare time--anyone diagnosed with any sort of cancer goes through the nightmare and so does their family so you have all my sympathy--I know several people looking after their parents who have logged on to my site http://www.cansurviving.com and have found help for body, mind and spirit...there are no guarantees here but we are all in this together- This can help as it empowers you and her as well- all very best to you all, Regards, Judith

Fifi

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Fifi » Sun Jun 08, 2014 9:32 pm

Hi Sue,

I would say it is normal, unfortunately. My dad has a lot of days like that. It must be hard to deal with the fact that they have cancer, and especially that it is pancreatic cancer. To know what is happening to them must be just devastating. I think that somedays, they just want to shut themselves away from the world. My dad was worse at the beginning after diagnosis. He would say he didn't want anyone to see him, including me. He would get angry and then would be in tears. It is very hard to hear and see, as you know. Your mum has had a massive shock, and I cannot imagine how it would feel, or how she deals with it.

What I would say is just be there. Let her say how she is feeling. Make sure she knows she can let it all out to you. It hurts so much to hear a much loved parent so depressed, but I would rather he feel comfortable to say it to me, rather than keep it in. Keep calling your mum. Keep going round. Even if she tells you not to. It is just instinct to say that. I think they try to protect us when they do it, when really, all they want is for us to be there.

Take care Sue.

Leila xx

LMD
Posts: 120
Joined: Tue Apr 15, 2014 10:06 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby LMD » Sun Jun 08, 2014 10:30 pm

Hi again Sue...
Hopefully after the oncology appointment your mum will feel more positive..
I think Leila is right in what she says and the way your mum is feeling is fairly 'normal'... (It's so upsetting to see a parent like this though, I know). Try and stay strong for your mum. You aren't alone and keep posting on here. Thinking of you xxx

Sueoliver
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 8:22 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Sueoliver » Sun Jun 08, 2014 10:53 pm

Thank you everyone is so kind. I am an only child and am really close to my mum. My step mother was diagnosed with ureter cancer in March and has short term memory loss! My husband had a knee replacement op last Saturday! It is all just so horrible! My stepdad is 84 and this is so awful for him as well. He is a really lovely man.
I still can't believe this is happening. What I find so hard to understand is how someone can change so dramatically in a couple of weeks.
I will post on Thursday when we have seen the oncologist.
Sue x

Fifi

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Fifi » Sun Jun 08, 2014 11:01 pm

I'm a only child too. Was always happy that way, until now. Sometimes wish I had someone else who could go round and see him. I have always been so close to my dad. Love him so very much, and I can't believe it is happening to my dad. I pray and pray that it, well, you know.......

I know how heart breaking this is. It must be really hard for you, to have other illnesses in your family also. It's hard to take your mind of one thing, to concentrate on another.

Good luck Thursday. I would advise you write any questions down, as they come onto your head. Take them with you on Thursday and make sure the oncologist answers them for you.

Leila xx

Sueoliver
Posts: 519
Joined: Thu May 22, 2014 8:22 pm

Re: Mum's diagnosis

Postby Sueoliver » Wed Jun 11, 2014 9:47 am

Well I think I have read just about every post on this forum! Not very healthy I know!
Mum is seeing the oncologist tomorrow for her first appointment. I am filled with fear and dread so goodness knows how she is feeling. She is hardly eating anything now ...tiny amounts of jelly! She says she doesn't even like savoury food anymore.
Still no news from the McMillan nurses. Her GP came round to see her last week but she was in the hospital! He hasn't contacted her since!
Her anti sickness tablets make her very sleepy and she says she has no energy to do anything! She told me it took all her energy to have a shower yesterday!
Is this really all normal 3 weeks after diagnosis? I can't believe the shocking decline!
I will post after we have seen the oncologist tomorrow... If I can!
Sue x