Beyond scared

[FeeD]

Hi,

I am at my wits end with worry- hardly able to function now.

I am 49, Mum of 3 lovely teens and I have suffered from health anxiety in the past.

I've been ok pretty much until recently (start September) when my stomach and abdominal issues came back again. Bloating, abdominal pain, back pain, burping non stop, no appetite, tired etc. So after a few weeks I called doc- I went for bloods- not sure what exactly he tested but 3 vials. He said that all came back normal apart from iron (which is always low for me).

So he referred me for both an abdominal US and a pelvic US.

I had both and the pelvic one showed a couple of fibroids but apparently not a worry.

The doc texted me to say that the abdominal one "showed a mild abnormality" in pancreas head. So I am now referred for an MRI. I got my appointment for the 21st October but I am living a nightmare now. I am convinced I have PC. Absolutely convinced. I don't think I have lost weight, I do still have the other symptoms and have to go to the loo a good bit. Can anybody offer any words of wisdom or does this "mild abnormality" signal doom for me? Sorry for posting I just don't know where to turn and don't know how to get through the next 12 days......Thanks so much in advance!

Fee

[Marta]

You are in the worst days, because the fear of the unknown is usually much more than the fear the actual problem causes. I have no idea what you might have, but try to stay as calm as possible these days, if you feel posting here helps you, please do so and my best wishes for a benign abnormality.

[FeeD]

Hi Marta,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply.

I know I will just have to muddle on and deal with whatever cards I am dealt...like us all I guess.

It's just so scary.....

Thanks again,

Feex

[RoyBoy]

Hi, Pancreatic cancer is difficult to diagnose and find. I went to my GP three times before they sent me to a consultant and then he sent me for colonoscopy and CT scan with contrast. The colonoscopy was all clear but the CT scan with contrast where I had to drink a litre of fluid within the hour before scan ( ( nowadays they inject it into arm during scan). That found the ‘shadow’ in my pancreas and then sent to a specialist centre hospital for them to discuss my case and found I was suitable for surgery. That was April 2014. 6 months of chemo after it as well. Some people have cysts and non benign lesions. I had a blood test for CA19-9 the cancer tumour marker for pancreatic cancer. They still do that now on yearly follow ups. I lost a little bit of weight but never went yellow like some. I had a bit of diarrhoea and a little bit of constipation. I had severe backache that could wake me during the night. Fingers crossed you’ll be fine.

[FeeD]

Thank you Roy for taking the time to reply. So kind and so informative.

I was so happy to see you were diagnosed 6 years ago too so there is certainly hope!

I hope you are keeping really well and thanks again- people can really be so kind.

Fingers crossed for the 21st.... xx

[Borobi]

It’s difficult to reassure you until you’ve got the results of your MRI, but I think if they thought it was cancer they’d refer you straight away to a consultant.

[FeeD]

Thanks Borobi. The Italian radiographer was doing a breast US on me at the time and he said " Oh I read your abdominal US and all ok but something on the pancreas". He waffled on and said something about an MRI or a blood test but seemed rather non-plussed. It was difficult to concentrate as he was about to do a breast biopsy (which was clear ) at the time and unexpected. Anyway then he sent results back to my GP (who had referred me) and he being a really good guy texted me the message about the "mild abnormality" and indicated that he didn't think much to worry about. But I worry- I would worry if I had nothing to worry about!! I am trying to keep busy with work and walks etc and I so hope I won't get bad news. Thank you too for taking the time to reply to me. x