A forum for family, friends and carers of pancreatic cancer patients

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pauline
Posts: 48
Joined: Mon May 25, 2009 3:24 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby pauline » Tue May 10, 2011 7:43 am

dearest Ellie ,
there is nothing I can say but to say thinking of you both and sending all my love to you both of you

be strong my friend

all my love and prayers
Pauline x x x

Charlotte
Posts: 12
Joined: Sun Mar 06, 2011 1:51 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby Charlotte » Wed May 11, 2011 12:09 pm

Oh gosh Ellie, I just read your latest post on here, I'm so sorry to hear your news.

Sending you love and strength,

Charlotte xxx

millyjo
Posts: 74
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 4:29 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby millyjo » Wed May 11, 2011 7:03 pm

Oh Ellie I'm so sorry to here your news.
Both you and Brian have been inspirational, not only for us but in the way you have battled and fought.
I understand your state of shock, as up until the last it is never true, and there has to be that miracle. . . One day.
day! Even to this day I sense shock at what happened to my mum.
My thoughts are with you both my love.
Millyjo xxxx

Ellie
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:03 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby Ellie » Thu May 12, 2011 8:46 am

Thank you all for your lovely messages of support. I was so touched by your kind words.

Thinking of you all, too.

Love
Ellie
x

CFF
Posts: 56
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 9:38 am

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby CFF » Thu May 12, 2011 11:48 am

So very sorry to hear about Brian. Have followed your posts for so long and you both have given me (and others I'm sure) so much hope.

Can't understand what you must be feeling. I'm certainly sure that the years of fighting and 'knowing' don't prepare you.

The next few weeks and months particularly will be so difficult I know. Hope you can find all the support you need with your friends and family and on this forum when you need us.

Thinking of you.

C

ladywood
Posts: 39
Joined: Mon Nov 29, 2010 11:31 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby ladywood » Tue May 17, 2011 4:22 pm

Dear Ellie, I've been away so only just read your latest posts. just want to say I'm so sorry to hear about Brian and I am thinking of you. Love Marie x

pamela
Posts: 27
Joined: Sun Aug 08, 2010 9:52 am

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby pamela » Tue May 17, 2011 7:55 pm

I'm sorry to hear Brian is not too good just enjoy those precious moments together.Thinking of you.

Pamxx

Ellie
Posts: 302
Joined: Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:03 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby Ellie » Tue May 17, 2011 11:01 pm

Hi everyone

Thanks again for all the kind messages. A lot has happened just lately, so I'll briefly explain.

We had a pretty bad week last week, with Brian falling over 3 times and on one occasion cutting his head and me needing to call an ambulance. Fortunately, there was no serious damage, but I was struggling to cope because he was getting so weak and I was finding it difficult to get him up from chairs etc. I was starting to wonder how I was going to cope when things took a turn for the worse.

On Saturday morning, I became worried that he wasn't waking up and seemed "different". I called the district nurse, who was concerned enough to arrange for him to be taken into the hospice by ambulance. That was awful, as his sister, nephew & niece and their sons were all coming to see him that day and arrived to see him being taken away. We got into the hospice and it felt like that was it - we were literally saying our goodbyes. I rang my daughter and she set off from Cornwall. However, by late afternoon, he had picked up and was a bit brighter. I think I almost went into shock - one minute thinking I was losing him, the next that he seemed ok. It was a very emotional time.

Since then, the doctors have told us that he may only have a week left, but I am finding that hard to believe somehow. Yes, he is physically weak but he is still eating, drinking and enjoyed a lot of fussing over by the staff yesterday and today. He may even be able to come home for a few hours tomorrow. I have gone from feeling this is the end to laughing and joking with him today, almost like normal. I really don't know what to think! I have slept at the hospice twice and spent the days inbetween with him, but as he was better today I am home to try and get a good nights sleep at home. I am just finding it such a strain, wondering just how bad things really are.....

Anyway, thanks again for your kind words and I will update on things if they change .

Love
Ellie
x

DRAD3
Posts: 435
Joined: Wed Mar 16, 2011 11:22 am

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby DRAD3 » Wed May 18, 2011 2:37 pm

Hi Ellie

Thanks for pointing me to your update! You must be exhausted with the rollercoaster ride you are on. I still can't quite adjust to how unpredictable things seem to be with this disease. I have given up trying to work out what tomorrow will bring - I think that side of things can be extremely stressful because you just want to do the best by everyone and if you had a crystal ball, you could plan and make sure you did everything "right". I am so glad to hear that Brian was brighter after such an awful week last week and you were able to enjoy a laugh - those moments when all seem well must feel precious, if not a little surreal. Take care of yourself when you are able, Ellie and love and strength to you and Brian.

Deb
x

Nardobd
Posts: 479
Joined: Sat Feb 14, 2009 6:25 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby Nardobd » Wed May 18, 2011 8:07 pm

What can anyone say Ellie, apart from you are in all of our thoughts and we send you and Brian much love and strength.

Nicki xx

lynbo
Posts: 269
Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2010 6:23 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby lynbo » Wed May 18, 2011 11:04 pm

Hi Ellie

sending you a massive hug, keep your chin up, you may not feel like it but your doing brill xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

millyjo
Posts: 74
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 4:29 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby millyjo » Thu May 19, 2011 9:25 pm

Dearest Ellie,
I'm so so sorry to here Brian isn't too good. . .words seems inadequate.
These times even after so many years together are so very precious andyet so hard to cope with, in the knowledge that time is now of the essence.
I'm sure despite your shock, distress you are being your formidable self, Brian has had an Angel beside him.
Thinking of you both daily.
Love and regards.
Millyjoxxx

clair2305
Posts: 154
Joined: Thu Aug 13, 2009 1:43 pm

Re: How are you Nicki, Ellie and LA

Postby clair2305 » Fri May 20, 2011 8:39 am

Hi Ellie

I don't get on the board much since Blue passed away, I find it too upsetting and am still struggling myself. I remember when I first posted on the forum you were one of the first to respond and there seemed to be a little group that formed, all responding to each others posts, and I find it hard that this group is dwindling.

Lynne (lynbo) has been keeping me up to date with you and Brian and I'm so sorry to hear what she has been telling me.

Ellie, you are in my thoughts, I say that with sincerity, I hope you and Brian are getting the support you need, be kind to yourselves....I really dont know what to say...

Lots of Love
Clair