A forum for advanced pancreatic cancer issues

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Postby charney » Wed Aug 01, 2012 8:37 am

I am so sorry to hear about your mum,
my thoughts are with you.
xxx cheryl

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Postby laura » Wed Aug 01, 2012 1:42 pm

hi there, so sorry to read your post, such a beastly rollercoaster of an illness, i really hope that your lovely mum is well cared for, its the least we all want and deserve.
sending you wishes of strength and love,
thinking of you all. laura xx

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Postby ma2houra » Sun Aug 26, 2012 7:47 am

I am sitting in a room full of people..the overwhealming smell of roses is suffocating.
Listening to the small talk makes me sick, i dont care about politics or diets or the kind of work he does or she does.
I lift my head and glance over at the picture of my mum..on my wedding day.
She looked stunning, all i can think of is she is better then ALL the people in the room.

...she's gone

Passed on tuesday in my home in the arms of my sister and I. That was her wish and I feel privelidged to have been able to offer her that. She loved my home, loved the open plan and the garden. All she asked was to stay home. Palliative care were great they would come almost everyday and without their support i doubt if it could of been possible.
Out of trials come endurance, we sure endured!

The last two weeks of my mums life were hard to bear.
She became confused...not making sense, then she stopped talking only saying a few words here and there. Occasionally she had lucid moments and i would be so happy that my mum came back. I would drop everything and sit with her and she would tell me how much she loved me and how proud she is of me, then she was gone again.
It broke my heart because I missed her already.

Then she bearly got out of bed, her weakness led to deaper depression. She was sad over her lost independance...and I was sad over her sorrow. Three days before she passed she stopped eating all together.
It was then i knew that was the point of no return. All night her breathing would be laboured and all night i would be in and out of her room moistening her mouth and turning her and holding her hand.
The last night she developed a horrible rattle in her chest and then hiccups. Each time she would hiccup i would burst into tears.

We hoped the sedation would help her pass peacefully but two hours before she died she had a surge of energy. She sat bolt upright and tried to get out of bed. After not talking for days she yelled out "get me up!"
Within 10min the nurse arrived and sedated her..and 15min after that her breathing slowed right down.
Then in a blink she was gone.

I feel so lost and all this feels sureal. I know after the funeral it will be harder.
The world had lost a great person...i miss her already

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Postby NICOLA » Sun Aug 26, 2012 8:33 am

Hi ma2houra, Im so sorry your mum has gone, I lost my mam 2 weeks ago to this awful cancer, it seems most stories on here follow the same pathway, we try our hardest to help but I just felt like a spectator watching my mam fade away.
My mam too had a surge of energy 1 hour before she died the palative care nurses had just settled her then left when she became very restless wanting to be up and shouting out for help then she died with my dad and I holding her hand.
2 weeks on the only comfort I have is that she is now at peace. I believe a mother and daughter bond is the strongest of all. I also found great comfort by making a photo album and I passed it around all of our family and friends after the funeral, everytime I go to see my dad I have a flick through it.
You have done your mum proud and remember she is still part of you xx

Support Team
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Postby Support Team » Tue Aug 28, 2012 4:02 pm

I am very sorry to hear that your Mum has died. Please accept my condolences on behalf of Pancreatic Cancer UK.


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Postby Ella50 » Tue Aug 28, 2012 5:25 pm

I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your mum.
My heart goes out to you.. I know how surreal it is.
I lost my mam 7 weeks ago today to pc and I still cant believe she's gone. I keep talking to her all the time.. it helps..
My thoughts and prayers are with you
Stay strong
Love Ella xx

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Postby louiepc » Tue Aug 28, 2012 6:45 pm

I a so sorry to hear of your mum's death.

It is nearly 8 months since my mum went, terrible time.

Take care and take each day as it comes, don't expect too much from yourself.

louie xxx

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Joined: Wed Mar 16, 2011 11:22 am


Postby DRAD3 » Tue Aug 28, 2012 7:50 pm

So very sorry to hear your sad news. My heart is heavy with so many losses over the last few days. Your recollection of your mum's last few days were so similar to my husband Gary's - eating just ending, confusion and then moments of lucidity and surges of energy. It made it all the more surreal because I never knew what to expect although I knew where we were heading and dreading that as each moment passed. Take care of yourself now as you will suddenly feel very tired and will need lots of rest and time to come to terms with it all. Who am I kidding - I'm not even close! Try though! We think of you and send all our love at what is a dreadful time for you and your family. Much love.

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Postby rachelqt » Tue Aug 28, 2012 9:35 pm

Im so sorry to read about the loss of your mum.
Another person taken too soon from this awful disease.
Your in my thoughts and prayers
Rachel x

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Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:53 pm


Postby laura » Tue Aug 28, 2012 10:24 pm

hi, another sad loss. i am so sorry, how lovely that you were able to fulfill your mums wish , to be at home with you, well done, remember the happy, good times, love laura xxx