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Posts: 954
Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2013 8:15 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby J_T » Sat Oct 19, 2013 12:27 am

Oh my dear Carole I'm so sorry you have lost your wonderful Clive and for it to be preceded by all those errors must be hard to bear. I am so glad though that you managed to get him home into a loving environment.

I can't quite believe we have lost yet another great man in such a short space of time, first Karen's wonderful Bob, then my darling Ray and now your much loved Clive. This really is the most horrendous of diseases.

I am sending much love and know that there are those of us in the forum family that know exactly what you are going through.

Be kind to yourself.

Julia xxx

Posts: 788
Joined: Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:43 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Cathy » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:15 am

Oh Carole,

I am so so sorry to hear your terrible news. And so quickly as well!! My heart breaks for you and your children.

Clive fought a brave fight and I hope that you can get comfort that he died peacefully with you. I cannot imagine how you must feel.

I am thinking of you, Hannah and Jamie and hope that you can take comfort from all the love and support that people will, I am sure undoubtedly offer you in bucketloads, including from your forum family here.

We are thinking of you Carole

Much love

Cathy xxxxx

Posts: 157
Joined: Fri Jul 05, 2013 11:53 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby belgrade » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:33 am

I am so sorry to hear to hear about your husband. I've been reading your posts since I started using this forum and Clive has been through so much in this awful fight. My thoughts are with you and your children.
Hilary x

Posts: 219
Joined: Fri May 03, 2013 9:39 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Bee » Sat Oct 19, 2013 5:37 am

I am so sorry to hear of your loss,. It sounds like you had a truly awful weekend aswell before you brought him home, I am glad that you managed to bring him home and you managed to say the things you wanted to.
As for your children, I have 12 and 14 year old so can really identify with your situation. I hope you have lots of support around you and am sure you and your children will look after one another.

Take care

Bee xx

Posts: 688
Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2012 8:48 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Slewis7313 » Sat Oct 19, 2013 5:57 am

Carole, I am so sorry to hear that Clive lost his battle with Pancreatic Cancer and that the system seemed to let him down when needed most. It was good to see that you recognized what was happening and you moved him to the place he obviously loved for his final days. Thanks for the help you have given me and others along your all too short journey and I will be thinking about you and your family over this very difficult period.

Take care


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Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2013 8:15 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby J_T » Sat Oct 19, 2013 10:00 am

Hilary lost her dear Dave recently too, we have had a lot of sadness all at once it seems :(

Carole, it must be so hard for your twins too.

I'm sending love to each and every one of you in our forum family

Julia xxx

Posts: 513
Joined: Mon Jul 08, 2013 8:29 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby nikkis » Sat Oct 19, 2013 11:38 am

So sorry to hear you and Clive have lost the fight against this ghastly disease. It must have been hard getting things organised to get him home, its fantastic that you had the courage and strength to do this.
Thinking of you and your children,

Posts: 220
Joined: Mon Jun 03, 2013 12:20 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby cestrian » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:12 pm

Dear Carol

So very sorry to hear of your sad loss, please accept my sincere condolences. So very sad to see another brave man losing the battle.

My love and prayers go out to you and the twins, I'm sure you will be a great source of love and strength to each other in these very difficult days and may your God walk with you.

Love and Peace


Posts: 100
Joined: Sun Jun 09, 2013 9:52 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Jwilson » Sat Oct 19, 2013 2:11 pm

Carole. Sincere sympathies to you and your family. It seems that you had a horrendous time and dreadful treatment. Poor Clive and poor you. You made a very very brave decision to bring him home and you must be really glad that you did. So much kinder than in a hospital bed. Thank you for sharing all of this with us on the forum. It's a great support for those suffering this awful thing and their partners. Wishing you strength to get through the next dark days.
June x

Posts: 32
Joined: Sun Jan 20, 2013 4:53 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Dfarmer » Sat Oct 19, 2013 7:23 pm

Thinking of you Carole. I'm pleased you managed to get Clive home which I know you'll take comfort from.

Posts: 332
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2013 12:01 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby InfoForMum » Sat Oct 19, 2013 9:45 pm

Carole, I've dipped in and out of your story to date, having started my own journey with Mum in mid August. I just wanted to add my thoughts to those of others. I know I dread dealing with the reaction of my children to losing their grandma almost more than I dread dealing with my own feelings. I can't conceive of the deep hurt you are going through watching your children starting to try and make sense of this. Please do get in touch with Macmillan as I've been told by a close friend that they were amazing with her young teenage children and provided lots of support to her in helping them deal.

Most importantly please make sure you get looked after by anyone you trust to invite in. More one day at a time. So sorry you have all this to deal with thanks to this bastard thing, but do come and vent, share, mull over events or whatever.

Take care


Posts: 94
Joined: Sat Oct 20, 2012 4:08 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Sueba » Sun Oct 20, 2013 7:59 am

I really don't know what to say.......
Even though we have never met we have emailed each other over the last year and we have followed each other's up and downs etc we've had a laugh and I've always admired your sense of humour in awful situations.
It was obvious what a lovely man Clive was and how you have always fought his corner ,he must have been so proud of his lovely wife!
I can't imagine what you are going through and Jamie and Hannah (the same age as my youngest)well my heart just breaks....
Take comfort that you could tell him everything you needed to and a I wish I could be there to give you a hug.
Thinking about you and sending you strength

Posts: 77
Joined: Thu Sep 05, 2013 1:53 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Birchen » Sun Oct 20, 2013 4:37 pm

So very sorry that you have lost your much loved husband. Have read your posts since my husband was diagnosed in June. No words can cover how you must be feeling.
thinking of you and your family

Lyn x

Carole McGregor
Posts: 50
Joined: Thu Dec 13, 2012 9:19 pm

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby Carole McGregor » Wed Oct 23, 2013 12:28 am

Oh you lovely, lovely people. Thank you so much for your kind words. That you can find the time to offer comfort to someone you have never met in the midst of your own personal crisis leaves me speechless.

I'm not sure how I feel right now. Lots going on with people coming and going, funeral arrangements to be made, questions to ask about Clive's care but all the time feeling like I am living in a parallel universe not really connected to the real world. I do know I feel anger. My amazing sister (who Clive always said he would marry if I ever stepped out of line), registered Clive's death for me. When the registrar saw the cause of death she sighed and said how she had been discussing with a colleague just the other day, how many more deaths they had seen in recent years due to pancreatic cancer and in much younger people than before. It is a national disgrace. I have set up a web page on Just Giving for Clive to help raise funds in lieu of flowers. Don't any of you dare make a donation - this is for others to show their support for our battle - but you might want to have a look at the pictures of my gorgeous husband at his best. Those are the images of Clive I will hold in my heart forever more.

Sue - you give Mick and those lovely boys of yours a special hug from me.

Carole xxx

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Joined: Sun Mar 24, 2013 8:15 am

Re: Chemotherapy options

Postby J_T » Wed Oct 23, 2013 8:30 am

Carole, I can empathise with every word you have written, its just all so familiar.

I too, am focussing on old photos and trying to remember the healthy, full of life Ray pre illness.

Clive would be so proud of you. Do take care of yourself.

Wishing you the strength to get through the difficult days ahead.

Julia xxx