mum's birthday in the hospice

[Mistipop]

So all hopes for getting mum home this afternoon for her birthday were dashed. This morning the nurses helped her have a bath, do her hair and get ready for a few hours at home to celebrate her 65th birthday. sadly she was quite confused and panicky about the whole thing so the nurses thought it would be better if the party came to her! (balloons and banners down for a trip across town!)

We actually had a really lovely afternoon, she managed to stay awake, ate a little and enjoyed her time with her grandchildren (we had permisssion to take them out of school)

All went better than we had dared dream....

until 10 mins before we left she threw up whilst taking her paracetamol!

She's sick quite a lot even though she has tried many anti sickness meds in her syringe driver. It just kind of spoilt the day a little.

[laura]

hi misti, glad that mum was awake enough to enjoy her visit from you and the grandchildren, a shame that she was sick just before you left, for you and for her, try and focus on the enjoyable part of the day, goodness me, must be so hard for you, mum only being 65, i know it affects people even younger, my hubby for 1, i think we all expect to have a longer life than 3score and ten, these days, untill one of these diseases rears its ugly head. thinking of you misti, love laura xxx

[lynbo]

Hi Misti

Just think though, you made a real effort for your mums birthday, today it was all about her, and not about PC, I think you have achieved a good day, yes your mum was sick, but she was awake and with people she loves on her day.

Let's hope some more of those good days are ahead.

Take care

Thinking of you

Xxxx

[Mistipop]

Thank you. She's so confused most of the time now, sometimes in an agitated way and other times in a very sweet way. My mum has been moved from a 4 bed room to a single room, it's lovely, a real little home from home but she now believes she is in a new flat of her own and has asked for some personal belongings, rugs/cushions etc. Do we go along with her or keep reminding her of where she is and why?

We don't know what to do for the best.

X

[laura]

hi misti,, whatever makes mum settled and happy, try to do, dont know if the hospice has any rulings about things like that, wouldnt think so, but best to ask, it is mums "home" for now so why wouldnt she want treasures around her, no harm is there in going along with her? if it helps to keep her peaceful i would definately want to do it.

take care thinking of you all love laura xxxx

[Mistipop]

Thanks everyone for your replies. We had decided just to go along with whatever mum says/wants as it's not hurting anyone, in fact she hasnt really spoken of her room in that way for a day or so. She wasn't so good today, very sleepy and in pain. The nurses do a brilliant job but they aren't mind readers and my mum is a bugger for not telling anyone she has pain (no idea why)

[laura]

hi there misti, "mums" are renoun for not wanting to be a nuisance! so perhaps you need to second guess her and encourage her to be honest about her pain, as that way it will be less "trouble" for anyone if they know what to give her, she might just fall for it?

glad youve decided to go along with what she wants, its easier all round isnt it? though she would probably enjoy a few bits of her own aroun her,

chin up , keep on going. love laura xx

[AnthonysDaughter]

Hi misti, another thought about your mum not wanting to say she is in pain might be that everytime she had pain relief it makes her tired and want to sleep all the time, I know dad wad like that, he would be asleep very shortly after his side of oxynorm, he was taking 20ml at a time. Big hugs to you and your mum xxx