message for clair 2305

[lynbo]

Hi Clair

Just wondering if you are ok? I havent seen you on here for a while and was looking at old posts and thinking of you

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[clair2305]

Hi Lyn (and others)

i've been watching the forum but not posted till today, so just touching base really.

Everything is rattling round in my brain and I haven't been out the house since end of October....protected by being able to stay in cos of weather and saying I'm not interested in going out whilst people are doing their xmas shopping etc, it's amazing how you can get by with online grocery shopping.

but next week i wont have that protection but the thought of going out feels me with dread, makes me wanna throw up.

will post again soon.

Clair

PS - did that letter to my MP, got a pathetic response, apparently my MP likes to express his own opinion.....I thought they were employed my us to express their constituents concerns...my mistake, or maybe his cos he will be getting another email!

[lynbo]

You go Clair,

Well i have just learned that a lady from my area is climbing mount kilimanjaro in feb, and she would like to do it in honour of Andy Judd, my beautiful husband, so we are meeting up to discuss. She had the whipples procedure and is a survivor of pc. So well done to her, and more fundraising.

I am also going to do the walk - 23 miles, in may, callled striving for survival! All money to PCUK.

i will hope to be in the local paper again, if you look on the awareness week thread, the moderator kindly posted the link so you can see my latest article!! Xxx

Lynne. X

[lynbo]

Oh, and i too dont like leaving the house, i write to Andy everyday and place the diary on top of his ashes. I will never sleep out. Dont like him to be on his own? If that sounds right? Xx

[Nardobd]

Good to hear from you again Clair, I've been wondering how you are.

Instead of using excuses for 'protection' how about telling the people who want you to go out that you really dread the thought? They may be able to help and support you.

Please do keep in touch.

Love

Nicki x

[clair2305]

Nicki

thanks for your reply....just a quickie, parents on way.

By protection I meant no one would question me or push me and they aint now, they know the way I feel and that I feel gut churning about the thought of going out, but I think it's bothering me more than others.....I don't like feeling this way.....and basically there's nothing to go out for, there's nothing for me to enjoy and the thought of bumping into people and listening to people moan about trivial things or expect me to discuss my business in the street and loads of other feelings....

[lynbo]

Clair

Please get in touch, i feel the same, ive actually upset people by snapping at them for moaning about their partners/husbands! But, i dont care, i feel angry, and upset, i go out, but never far. I know how you feel.

Lynne xxxxx

[clair2305]

Lynne

I see your body clock is up the wall too!

I did post this on the 'christmas' thread but I'll post it here too.

Sent a friend request to Andy, found you but couldn't send a request to you.

You can also email me at clair2305@hotmail.co.uk, it's an email address i give everyone, including spammers, but then I can give you my private email address.

Take care

Clair

[PCUK Nurse Jeni]

Hi Clair,

My name is Jeni Jones and I work for PCUK. I am a qualified oncology nurse with 11 years experience, including dealing with Pancreatic cancer.

I have been following your recent posts, and have seen that you are having physical symptoms at the thoughts of going out of the house.

Apart from feeling physically sick, are there any other feelings/symptoms you get?

If you wish, I would be more than happy to speak with you about how you are feeling. It would be good to see if there is anyhting we can do to help.

You can email me at support@pancreaticcancer.org.uk if this is an option for you.

Best wishes,

Jeni.

[clair2305]

Hi all

I've been watching posts....so how is everyone?

Me, well can't gloss it up, so I wont. Miss Blue more than I can ever express.

Exchanged emails with Lynne and we've been in contact regularly, sometimes just a rant, sometimes a giggle and sometimes a cry.

Oh and I feel very in tune to the word 'pancreas'. Everytime I turn on House what dya reckon he's just diagnosed.....4thoughttv the other day had a woman with PC on it and today just had that Clint Eastwood film on 'Space Cowboys' in the background and Tommy Lee Jones pre-shuttle medical tests revealed....guess what!

Although today cooked my first roast beef dinner and it was a triumph (yes other people did eat it)....Blue did nearly all the cooking up to his diagnosis (and still did a lot afterwards) and as my mum would say about my cooking 'she just aint got it in her' and Blue would just say 'one chop'....need I say more, so I am happy that I managed it....reckon that's almost ten dishes in my repotoire....preferably one pot too!