Thanks for sharing your experiences . . .

[sandraW]

Mo, I hope Peter is feeling better today and gets a better offer than soup! for lunch.

Joking apart at least they acted quickly, and hopefully the infection will subside quickly too, and he will soon be home again. lets us know how he's doing, don't post much now but still follow you all avidly, take care love sandrax xx

[Didge]

Rob hated soup and told the hospital staff. Unfortunately it hadn't been communicated to the poor lady who cheerfully asked him if he'd like some soup after his op. I cringed with embarrassment when he bellowed for the whole ward to hear, "SOUP!! I HATE SOUP!!" to be fair he was still woozy with morphine.

[Elaine123]

Hi Mo ....poor Peter one minute he's up with the brilliant scan results then wham he is laid low again by a nasty infection...the course of PC definitely doesn't run smooth. Mo sometimes when we got encouraging new at the clinic my thought when we left was " ok we are at the top of the rollercoaster how long until it goes down again"

I hope all those antibiotics start working soon and it is not long until he is home and up to his tricks again. Will keep checking in to see your updates. Lov and hugs to both and Boris he will be feeling neglected.

Elaine

Xx

[Proud Wife]

Thinking of you Mo (and Peter and Boris of course) xx

[Justamo]

He's home. Yesterday evening actually. One or two out of the thirty of so antibiotics they tried worked, and the remainder of the course can be taken, as Peter put it: "Orally, in my mouth", so we packed up the teddy and the slippers and the creons, said "Goodbye" to his cousin who was in the next bed, and went home. With one lot of antibiotics in a little box and a prescription for the other antibiotics so we had to come home via Boots which is, fortunately, open until 8pm. On a Sunday.

He is exhausted. Partly from the infection, and partly from a nice old gentleman in the ward who got up at 20 minute intervals throughout the night and tried to get into each of the other 7 (occupied) beds in turn. As it was terribly obvious that the nice old gentleman was doubly incontinent, none of the other patients was particularly keen on having him as a bed fellow, so chaos reigned throughout the night. And during the night three patients were transferred to other wards, another four were admitted, and in the morning Peter found himself in the next bed to his cousin. They haven't seen each other since they were youngsters 70 years ago, but somehow they recognised each other so each had somebody to listen to their whingeing and moaning and complaints about the weather/staff/beds/fellow patients. And then I went and spoiled it all by fetching Peter home.

I was tempted to offer him soup for his supper but thought better of it and made a sandwich out of the materials which should have constituted a nice Sunday roast dinner and bought at enormous expense on Thursday before any of this Holby City stuff started.

And the net result is that (a) the surgical team did a bit of talking to each other and decided that the blockage was not significant enough to surge, and (b) the chaps in the lab found the right combination of antibiotics to deal with the lurgy which was causing the problem. And now they've given him back to me.

It's knocked his confidence back quite badly. In Peter's world, he had finished the chemo, his scan showed no further tumour growth, Dr Feelgood was pleased so, ergo, he was "Better". Golf course here I come. And it's not like that. He's tired and tetchy, but I think that's mostly sleeplessness. And it's POURING. Really bucketing down. And we keep on getting national weather forecasts warning of heat stroke and UV rays and pollen counts. Our pollen is so soggy you couldn't count it.

So we're plodding on, and this week's excitement is an appointment at the eye clinic tomorrow, which may include an injection into Peter's eye for macular degeneration. It depends what they find when they have a look at it. About one in three visits is injection-free so I hope tomorrow's appointment is one of the lucky ones. And afterwards we are going to the garden centre to buy some 9 foot-long bamboo poles because my jasmine has elected itself Chairman of the Escape Committee and is making a bid for next door's garden and is threatening to take a clematis with it.

Boris got a present today. He likes to drink out of watering cans in the garden, (yes, I know it's stupid, but try telling him that), and today in the supermarket I spotted a child's watering can which will be perfect for him and may keep him out of the other ones.

Buying a watering can for the cat.

Funny what stress makes you do, isn't it ?

Love Mo

[Guest]

Delighted that Peter is home, you managed a swim and Boris has a new watering can. Amazing how easily satisfied we all are.

Love and hugs

M xx

[sandraW]

Glad to hear Peter is home. and keeping you on your toes. You know Boris won't drink out of the aforesaid watering can don't you, it will be the wrong shape, colour, smell position, or something else will be wrong, he will go back to drinking the slightly smelly out of its sell by date water, but you tried Mo you tried! love sandrax xx

[stepuha]

Here is that good news I was looking for. I am happy to hear that Peter is home and that antibiotics are working. That was a quick turnaround. I hope Peter perks up soon. I am sure sunshine will help when it arrives.

I have an opposite problem, it is far too hot and I can't wait for the rain to cool us down.

X stepuha

[Guest]

Hi Mo,

I hope you, Peter and Boris have had a good day. I agree with SandraW Boris is not going to go for that watering can, sods law. Thinking of you all as I often am.

M xxx

[Guest]

Hi Mo,

Just dropped by to say hello and let you know I was thinking of you as I often am xx

[Justamo]

I read all your posts about the watering can to Boris, and just to show how much attitude he's got he has fallen in love with his watering can and spurns his bowl in the kitchen. Cussed or what ? Good job we can't post photos in here . . .

Off to my cousin's funeral tomorrow, so it will be a difficult few days. Peter has got steadily better, and has copious notes telling him what to eat, when to eat it and how to heat it up in the microwave. He doesn't fill me with confidence when he does things like go out for lunch with a friend, test his blood, and then discover that he's left his insulin behind. Still, at least he went out.

Will post again at the end of the week.

Love

Mo

[Guest]

Thinking of you Mo and hope Peter is coping xxx

[Dandygal76]

Hey Mo, I am glad Peter is feeling better and I am sure he will manage whilst you are away. I am thinking of you as you say goodbye to your cousin... I am sure it was a fitting send off. x

[Proud Wife]

Thinking of you too xx

[Justamo]

Would you be horrified if I said I enjoyed the funeral ? It was a cathartic experience; quite beautiful, simple and humble, and very, very moving. There was a private service for the cremation in the morning; a wicker coffin, beautifully decorated with garden flowers, not a florists' wire in sight, and just a few of us attending. Very close friends, her god-children, her partner (and we have decided that we are cousins-in-law) and me. One of her closest friends who is a Minister took the service which was brief and simple and then the curtains closed. Although I didn't see them close because I always shut my eyes at that bit, and then we trooped out.

One of the close friends who attended had prepared a sandwich lunch, and although I didn't really have any sort of appetite I was swept up and given a seat and a cup of strong tea, and I was suddenly hungry, and enjoyed the lunch quite a lot.

Then in the afternoon we went off to a beautiful, really beautiful, church, and held the funeral service, only it was called a memorial service. Hymns chosen by Joan herself and a stunningly beautiful poem. An address by the officiating Minister - another friend - and a tribute from the diocesan chap; some of her medical colleagues had written pieces to be read out, and then a blessing. I thought I would be completely wrecked after the funeral and had wedged a whole heap of tissues into my handbag, but I didn't need them. The overwhelming feeling was of serenity. Afterwards we all had a nice cup of tea and more sandwiches, and then we went home.

Diane had guests staying - a god-daughter, one of her own relations, and me, so I suggested that we all go out for supper and it would be my treat. So we piled into the horrible little car which I had rented and had a bar supper and a good old talk about how the day had gone. And we all agreed that it couldn't have been more appropriate or fitting for our beloved Joan.

Of course, it wouldn't be me if something a bit off-the-wall didn't pop up during the day. As we were walking from the car park to the church for the memorial service a crowd of youngsters were handing out flowers. I thought we'd get a wobbly chorus of Hare Krishna too and was keeping an eye out for saffron robes, but evidently it was school children doing a Project on Random Acts of Kindness. So they were Randomly Kind to quite a few of our congregation, none of whom knew quite what to do with a gently dying flower which had been pressed into their hands by a small child and which they had to hang onto throughout the service (the flower, not the child).

And then the next morning I came home. Peter had managed well, but wasn't quite so gung-ho about being Home Alone as he was last month when I abandoned him to visit Joan in the hospice. Don't think I'll be making another solo trip any time soon. We've had a surprise letter today asking him to make an appointment at the Radiology Department. Probably another scan, and I expect it's a follow up to his recent hospital stay when they thought he had some debris causing a slight blockage in his stent.

Next week is the major golf tournament in which I'm involved. God knows why, I don't play golf, but I am fairly good at shoving bits of paper around and there's a lot of admin to do. I expect they asked me because I'm so bossy. Peter will take his meals at the club while I'm there, and Boo will be sulking for a week because we'll both be out. It will be 10 hour days for most of the week but perhaps it's a good thing to be busily occupied for a wee while.

You have no idea how much your kind messages have meant to me over Joan's death. It's been hard to talk to Peter about somebody dying of cancer, but I've been able to dump it all onto you, and get it off my chest. Thank you.

with love and thanks. Mo xx

[Veema]

I know exactly what you mean about the funeral Mo...because that's jyst how I felt at Nige's...it was all so lovely it was hard to feel sad.

I'm sure Boris will cope...mind you, I'm panicking about leaving Dido on her own today for 7 hours whilst I take Phoebe to a football tournament. But then Dido is the destroyer of all things paper...I'll just have make sure there's nothing left lying about...but she always finds something somewhere!

Hope your busy week goes well.

Loads of love

Vx

[Proud Wife]

Horrified? Of course not! It just means that everyone did their utmost for Joan and gave her the send off that she deserved. Mo, I'm so pleased to hear it went well. I thoroughly enjoyed reading your account of the day, with a few Mo-isms thrown in for good measure!

We were the same with hubby's funeral. We had no idea what he wanted so we planned it according to his passion for bright yellow. Everything went according to plan, we made it a celebration of his life and ended up having a good day, considering the circumstances.

I totally get what you say about being unable to offload on Peter, that's perfectly natural. I'm sure news of her passing was bad enough. That's what we are all here for my lovely. 24/7.

Lots of love

PW xx

[Quickasyoucan]

Justamo how is Peter? And how are you after your cousin's funeral?

I am crying every day over Jake at the moment. I miss him in every moment of every day. I am seeing my dog behaviourist (I know sounds weird) is n s couple of weeks to get advice about breeds and steps to successfully get a new dog given I work full time but I can't somehow bear the thought of anything but Jake. I think this is about Dad too but somehow I'm weepy about my boy. That brings me to Boris how is the watering can??

[Marmalade]

Greetings Mo,

Hope the tournament went well and that you are now able to rest a little and maybe get a swim for yourself. Thinking of you xxxx

[Justamo]

I was going to post a couple of hours ago, but couldn't leave Johanna Konta alone with Peter because as well as being a darned good tennis player she's good looking, too. But her Centre Court match is over now, so I can leave Peter and the Wimbledon crowd to watch the rain, and sneak away to my study to catch up.

Phew. It's been a hectic week. Ten hour days doing the admin for a major golf week (and a good few months preparation too) but all went swimmingly (not literally: this has been the only year we haven't had to reschedule matches because of flooded greens and fairways like rivers) and the whole week was a roaring success. Because I am known for throwing my teddy out of the pram if interrupted when Doing Sums my fellow Committee Members leave me in splendid isolation to add up scores, deduct handicaps, apply Stableford rules, and come up with more or less the right answers and allocate the prize vouchers. There is a huge amount of job satisfaction to be gained from a complex administrative task completed successfully, so I quite enjoyed myself. I enjoyed myself even more when I was presented with a whopping great big garden voucher - don't know why they did that this year, but it's nice.

This week twelve months ago was the first indication that there was something wrong with Peter. Last year he played in one of the Friday matches and had to walk in after three holes because he felt so awful. Since then we've been to hell and back, met Mr Bogeyman and Dr Feelgood, sat in countless clinics and read the same Woman's Weekly in every one of them, had to buy new pyjamas because of many hospital admissions, and as a special Buy One Get One Free offer acquired Diabetes along with PC.

THIS year My Patient was able to referee one of the Thursday finals by using his expensive Trump Mobile to go round the course which was good, because it made him feel important every time he licked his pencil to record a score, and he had nearly as much energy at the end of the round as he started with. AND - he played in the Friday event with two carefully chosen partners and didn't have to be stretchered in after 4 holes. He spent two days on the sofa afterwards mind you, and had to suffer lecture number 985 from me on Pacing and Being Sensible, but it was a triumph for him really. This time last year he was deciding who to bequeath his clubs to and complaining that it wasn't worth buying new socks because he wouldn't get the wear out of them. This year he was riding about on his Trump Mobile being positive.

This may all seem rather facetious, but golf is quite important to his quality of life. I have never minded how much time or money he spends on golf - there are a lot worse things he could do instead - and the time he spent at the club this week was a testament to the good care he has received over the past year. And the reason I am not lying in a foetal position in a corner, sobbing that I can't carry on any longer, is because of the support and love that I've received from my forum family.

Who knows what next year will bring ? I don't actually care very much. I'm more than happy that today we've had an ordinary day, sitting in the eye clinic for Peter's check up, reading Womans Weekly, and doddering around the garden centre afterwards. We have lots of appointments for scans and oncology clinics and stuff, but today was alright and I hope tomorrow will be too.

This probably sounds overwhelmingly smug to those of you who are having active battles with dreadful symptoms, or who are sitting alone looking at an empty armchair, but landing on Planet PC makes you very sensitive to the little things in life as well as the thumping great big elephant in the room.

Boris has just come in to see what I am doing, so while I am counting my blessings I had better include my cat. He doesn't go in for a lot of philosophical stuff, he'd rather have a Dreamie and a game, so I'll get off now.

God bless,

Love Mo x

By the way, as I write this 'Inside Health' is on Radio 4. It's about Bart's Tissue Bank for PC and very interesting. Try to get the podcast on the BBC website if you've missed it.

[Quickasyoucan]

Mo so great to hear Peter continues to enjoy life. Your posts are a ray of sunshine. X

[Didge]

Middle of the night greetings Mo! Glad to hear about the golf. And the tennis! Still getting used to Wimbledon starting a week later so that my birthday this Friday will be men's semi finals day, not that I'm complaining. My daughter's wedding is in 2 weeks and I've still not sorted out the music I'm playing then a week later I'm organising a music weekend in Canterbury and I'm short of a cellist so if anyone knows an amateur cellist feel free to speak up! Love to everyone in our crazy tough pc world x

[sandraW]

Mo,

I am so glad you have had an "ordinary day" may you have many more, good to hear Peter managed his round so well and that you did such a wonderful job with organisation, you more that deserved the garden voucher I am sure. sending love to you both and of course Boris too.

take care sandrax xx

[Proud Wife]

Thank you ever so much for making me cry Mo, much appreciated!!!!!!

I think it was your comment about just being happy with an ordinary day. I know exactly what you mean. When you have good days, it's like all your christmasses coming at once. I remember my hubby sitting in the garden of a local pub, drinking a coke (he didn't touch alcohol after diagnosis) in the late afternoon sun, a few weeks before he died. He was struggling to walk by then and we were debating whether he should have any more treatment after just one cycle of gem/abraxane which was a 2nd line treatment almost finished him off. He was just so very happy to be sitting in the fresh air doing what normal people did. He told his oncologist he'd forgotten what a normal day could be. Whilst the decision was taken out of his hands with a rapid decline, it just made us realise that quality was far more important than quantity.

I aim now for what my son and I call "an acceptable day". Simply put, a good day is a bonus. I think that applies to both sides of the divide. My hubby and I had 9 really good months out of his 14 and for that I'm so so grateful. It's helped. I hate to think how I'd be coping if we'd been robbed of that like so many have.

I'm so pleased the tournament went well. You put so much effort into it and must now be exhausted. I hope you can find some "me" time. The gift voucher was a lovely gesture. I know you will have such fun using it. I'm sorry but you did make me laugh out loud with your BOGOF comment, it shows your strength of character that laugh in the face of adversity.

Long may your ordinary days continue. Create memories, take as many videos and photos as you can and live for the day.

Lots of love to you, Peter and Boris xx

[Marmalade]

Hi Mo,

So glad you have had a good week and don't you fret one bit about being smug. You are spot on with the good times being very special and I can't tell you how pleased I am that you are having this "ordinary" time together. That Peter is so well is due in no small part to your excellent care.

Good old Boris, he's got his priorities sorted out and sometimes it does us all good to stop thinking too much and just take pleasure in simple things.

Lovely to hear from you Mo,

Marmalade xxxx

PS am making marmalade this evening with from oranges - on my second batch. I've got to get them out of the freezer as my house is going into store in a couple of weeks!