I think my dads journey is nearing its end

[janem]

I got a phone call from my dad this morning saying the pain was unbearable, the hospice told me to give him oramorph as well as his morphine patch and if still in pain repeat after 40mins which I did. The district nurse has been up and agreed it is time to going into the hospice, unfortunately there are no beds at the moment so he has been put on the list and will have the hospice at home coming to him! I am sitting waiting for the doctor to visit as the nurse said he was going to visit my dad this afternoon. He has only eaten a couple of biscuits since Saturday and had nothing today, he is also going back to the Simpsons colouring. I am just sitting here feeling useless at the moment wanting to help him but know that there is not much anyone can do.

[Dollysdaughter]

So sorry to hear this Jane, you must feel just dreadful. I would imagine you just being there is a comfort to your dad. Thinking of you and him,

Sara x

[suef]

Dear Jane,

Thinking of you and wishing you much courage.

Love,

SueF

[J_T]

Sorry to hear this. Is your dad on slow release morphine? Ray went on up to 80mg morning and evening plus oramorph if needed. Towards the end he had a syringe driver which pumped the drugs straight into his bloodstream and worked very well at keeping him comfortable and pain was never really an issue for him. In the final days they upped his drugs again and he was asleep virtually all the time.

Thinking of you, I know how hard this is.

Julia x

[janem]

Thanks for your replies, the doctors increasing his patches to 40mcg/hr and his oramorph to 10mls when needed. The hospice have phoned and they have an admission meeting tomorrow at 9.30 and if he is most at need hopefully he will be admitted.

[Guest]

So so sorry to read this. It really does pull at my heart. My own dad has recently been diagnosed, so hearing about someone else's father, really is close to home. I'm sorry I don't have advice for you, I wish I did. I am thinking about you both though.

Leila x

[sandraW]

Hope the Hospice can find a bed for your Dad and that they can make him more comfortable,

sending love and virtual ((hugs)) sandrax

[ChrisD]

Hello Jane,

You and your Dad are very much in my thoughts.

If the doctor and district nurses can manage your Dad's pain (for example, with a syringe driver to steadily deliver pain relief), your Dad could be 'comfortable' in the home environment. I say this, because if a hospice bed is not available, your Dad can still receive all the care that is needed at home.

For your information, it should be possible to have a hospital bed delivered to your home (with an air mattress), this is an excellent piece of equipment to help your Dad ....

If in the home environment, there could potentially be access to additional nursing support too - this maybe provided by charities that are able to support you with nurses to 'night sit' etc. Do ask your district nurse what additional support there could be if a hospice bed is not available, I hope that you will be pleasantly surprised.

Be with your Dad, talk to him, hold his hand and give him a cuddle; whilst you may think that you are helpless, do not underestimate the support that you are able to provide ....

With best wishes,

.... Chris

[belgrade]

Hello Jane,

I'm very sorry to hear about your Dad and know how difficult this time is. In my husband's last few days, we played his favourite music and my daughter read to him which seemed to bring him some comfort. The hospice, I'm sure will be able to manage your Dad's pain and make him comfortable. I know this is so hard for you, but you will find the strength to cope.

Thinking of you,

Hilary

[jules 2015]

Hi Jane

Having lost my dad to pc on 1st Nov, I know how difficult it is to see you Dad in so much pain. Hopefully they will be able to get your dad into the hospice and get his pain under control soon.

Sending you both big hugs

Julie x

[Janiebobs]

Jane,

You, your family and your dad are in my thoughts at this sad time. I hope you can get his pain under control which is my greatest fear for the end.

Jane x

[EmmaR]

Just to say be strong and know many of us have and some are still walking the path with you .

Love EmmaR x

[jay]

Thinking of you Jane

love jayne

[Cathy]

Hi Jane

I do hope you manage to get a bed after tomorrow's meeting. Our local hospice were superb with my Jonathan.

If not they should be able to organise assistance for you at home, district nurses and the like including a hospital bed and a syringe driver.

Everything crossed for you

Cathy xxx

[janem]

Just a quick message to say dad didn't get a bed yesterday but this morning he took a turn for the worst and was a priority and got a bed today. He arrived there at around 2pm and died just after 5pm. He wasn't there long but at least he got his wish to die in the hospice and not at home. He lasted 9 weeks and 6 days after mum died. I hope they are now back together and both at peace.

Thanks to everyone for the support since October.

Edited February 28, 2014 by janem

[Dfarmer]

Hi Jane

Just wanted to say how sorry I am and I'll be thinking about you and your family

Dawn

X

[J_T]

Jane, so sorry to hear your sad news. My sincere condolences at this very sad time.

Look after yourself

Julia x

[Didge]

So sorry to hear that Jane. Hope you find some comfort in knowing that your dad is no longer suffering.

x

[Guest]

Incredibly sorry for you and your family at this devastating time.

Please keep posting, maybe it could help you in some way.

Leila x

[EmmaR]

Oh Jane so sad another loss of a Dad to this awful disease but know you done everything you could for him and that your parents are reunited , look after yourself and find the strength to cope in the coming days & weeks .

EmmaR xx

[Cathy]

Hi Jane

So so sad and sorry to hear your very sad news.

I am glad your Dad managed to get his wish and into the hospice.

You did great for both your Mum and your Dad. I hope that you will be able to take some comfort from this in the days and weeks ahead. In the meantime, we are all here for you.

Loads of love and condolences

Cathy xxxx

[Charney22]

So sorry to hear about yr dad, it is one cruel disease

My thoughts are with you

Cheryl xx

[cestrian]

Dear Jane

Sincere condolences on the death of your father so shortly after the loss of your mother. He is now at peace and reunited with her somewhere in this great universe.

Our love and prayers are with you at this very sad time.

Love and Peace

Mike

[mogs]

So sorry to hear of your loss. Such a cruel,cruel disease. Love and prayers are sent to you at such a sad time.

Cara x

[PCUK Nurse Jeni]

Dear Jane,

So very sorry to hear the news of your dad's death, and as Mike says, so soon after your mum.

Please accept our sincere condolences at this sad time. We shall be thinking of you, as for anyone on here who has suffered the loss of a loved one from PC. Pleased that your dad got his wish to die at the hospice. Please do use the forums for support, as Leila has suggested. As you can see, many still use the forums after a bereavement.

Take care,

Jeni, Support Team.