A forum for family, friends and carers of pancreatic cancer patients

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louiepc
Posts: 238
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2011 10:38 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby louiepc » Wed Apr 04, 2012 7:31 pm

Nicki
I was thinking about you the other day. I'm sorry Ted is so poorly.

It's awful being in the situation watching someone you love so dearly go through this. I hope that he's as comfortable as can be.

Much love and prayers are.being sent louie xxx

laura
Posts: 385
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:53 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby laura » Wed Apr 04, 2012 7:41 pm

nicki, you and ted were in my thoughts also, i wanted to leave a message on here for you, wasnt sure what to do, not being sure how your situation was.

am truly sorry that ted is not so good, cant imagine how you are feeling.

sending you all my love and best wishes

laura x

ali
Posts: 90
Joined: Sat Jun 25, 2011 9:22 am

Re: Really confused

Postby ali » Wed Apr 04, 2012 9:08 pm

Nicki
thinking of you
love Helen xx

Barbara2
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:18 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Barbara2 » Thu Apr 05, 2012 6:25 am

Thank you all for your support as always. Nicki thank you especially for taking the time to think of me at what must be such a difficult time for you and your family. I am thinking about you and willing you the strength to help you through this awful time.

Barbara xxx

Barbara2
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:18 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Barbara2 » Fri Apr 20, 2012 12:01 pm

Hi again,
I haven't been on this forum for a wee while, my husband was eventually admitted to hospital and we have been on an emotional rollercoaster ever since. He has now had a successful stent op to address the jaundice, a further unsuccessful attempt at a stent op to address a blockage in the bowel which appears to be a tumour and subsequently a bowel bypass op. In the midst of this his kideys began to fail, his blood platelets have been low requiring transfusions and his liver is struggling. He has been in and out of high dependency and has even be unlucky enough to succumb to VRE, a hospital acquired infection. His doctors are now of the view he may have two primary cancers, both pancreas and bowel however either or may also be the primary and it may be we will never know. In any event we have been told the cancer is extermely aggressive, it is well advanced and my husband may only have a few weeks/months. There is no prospect of chemo as he will require to be 6 weeks post op before that could be considered and his cancer will apparently have advanced beyond chemo at that point. He remains in hospital as he is overcoming the most recent op and has a chest infection however we hope to have him home as soon as possible. My husband went into hospital on 3 April and all of this has occured in the space of 17 days, he only became ill with jaundice the second week in March, he was at work until then. My family are reeling and I am in shock - I think that's why I can write these words. I am grateful for the support I have received here and I didn't want you, all of whom have been through so much to think I was not. I wish I had more positive news but unfortunately I don't. I cannot believe the speed of this disease.

Barbara x

mints
Posts: 32
Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:43 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby mints » Fri Apr 20, 2012 2:44 pm

Hello Barbara,

Just read your post and it took me back to the same emotional rollercoaster.
I lost my husband (50)nine months ago,a once fit and healty man.The diagnosis alone sends your head spinning, not having faced this before it's difficult to know what questions to ask,or what you're likely to face next,or the speed in which this disease moves.It can make quite a difference once the stent is fitted and the infection blasted with heavy duty anti-biotics,but every case is different.
Nevertheless it's heartbreaking to watch for you,and your family.
I wish you all the strength you need,and try to remember to take care of youself.
Thinking of you at this difficlt time.

Nardobd
Posts: 479
Joined: Sat Feb 14, 2009 6:25 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Nardobd » Fri Apr 20, 2012 9:49 pm

Oh Barbara

Sending you thoughts of strength and comfort lovely. There's nothing anyone can say to make it better but you know that we're all with you in spirit.

Keep posting when you are able...even if it's just to vent - we're all here for you

Nicki

laura
Posts: 385
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:53 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby laura » Fri Apr 20, 2012 10:12 pm

oh barbara, am so sorry to read what you have all been experiencing, try to focus on getting hubby home, you will all feel happier, i dont want to give you false hope, im no medic, we were told brians pc was advanced stage 4, operated on unsuccessfully, 19 months chemo, none now for five n half months, had two shrinkages, i know how very fortunate we are, but drs can get it wrong, so please try and focus on the NOW so you dont have any regrets, my thoughts are with you all, try and look after yourself as well,
love laura xx

laura
Posts: 385
Joined: Thu Jul 01, 2010 1:53 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby laura » Mon Apr 23, 2012 11:31 pm

hi barbara, was wondering how you and hubby are doing? laura xx

Drew
Posts: 24
Joined: Fri Dec 30, 2011 7:34 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Drew » Tue Apr 24, 2012 6:38 am

Hi Barbara,

So sorry to hear of your Husbands experience, I understand how you feel - its all just a bit mad and somehow we are able to carry on .

Be there for him as much as possible - even when he is sleepy with the meds talk to him he will hear you. You are his support and the family will take the roll of supporting you.

It is a very difficult time for you all and i am sure you have already found that writing on the forum is your time to get it off your chest - we have all been there so you most deff. not alone.

be strong
Drew x

Barbara2
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:18 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Barbara2 » Tue Apr 24, 2012 1:27 pm

Hi again,

Thank you all for your kind words and support, I'm sorry I haven't replied to you sooner, at the moment I am really struggling, I'm finding it very hard to come to terms with everything that's happened. My husband is still in hospital and is quite low, he's coped so well but is finding things difficult at present, he desperately wants to come home but is not quite stable enough as yet. We are pushing the docs all the time but do recognise he needs a little more time to recover. Our hospital is a 50 mile round trip so I'm spending most of my time driving there and back to visit so have not had much time.

I want to say that I continue to be amazed at the level of support offered here, particularly given everyone has either been through or is facing their own struggle with this devastating disease, its a real testament to human compassion and genuine concern for others. Thank you so much.

Barbara xx

CFF
Posts: 56
Joined: Fri Apr 22, 2011 9:38 am

Re: Really confused

Postby CFF » Tue Apr 24, 2012 5:59 pm

Hi Barbara,

So sorry to hear you're husband is still in hospital and feeling low - it's no wonder that you feel you are struggling. Things have moved at a terrifying pace for you both.

My dad during his Whipples and for 3 months afterwards for various reasons was at a hospital over 50 miles away and it can really take it's toll. I hope you've got some friends and family you can lean on for practical and emotional support.

I'm sure you're both so keen for him to come home and I really hope he does soon. I'm sure they will let him at the earliest opportunity. I remember feeling so awful at my dad wanting to come home and telling him that he couldn't. It's really important they manage your husbands infection and pain. You're doing all you can to stay onto them and get him home as quickly as possible.

stay strong and be as brave as you can.

Thinking of you x

Nardobd
Posts: 479
Joined: Sat Feb 14, 2009 6:25 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Nardobd » Tue Apr 24, 2012 9:28 pm

Hi Barbara

It's really not surprising you are struggling: the shock, the worry and the understandable tiredness all play a part. Ted was like your hubby...never wanted to be in hospital, but it's the right place for your husband right now. Hopefully, he will be fit enough to come home soon.

Thinking of you both.

Nicki

Barbara2
Posts: 15
Joined: Thu Mar 29, 2012 9:18 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby Barbara2 » Mon Apr 30, 2012 11:29 am

Was really excited on Wednesday to hear I was getting my husband home on Thursday, all went well initially although he was very tired all day Friday. Also his wound from the bypass surgery had partially opened up and the district nurses were coming in to dress it daily, unfortunately by Saturday ascites was leaking from the wound at an alarming rate, soaking the dressing, his PJ's and even the bedclothes within minutes, so despite his protestations (I had to go against his wishes and call the doctor out)he was readmitted to hospital on Sunday morning. I dont know how much more of this rollercoaster to Hell either of us can take - I just want him home. I know he is in the right place at the moment but I feel like a complete heel. I know we have to stay positive if we are going to get through this so I have decided to view this as a temporary blip in our greater plan and am hoping he'll be back home again soon. Surely we're due a break soon?

Barbara

sadsloth
Posts: 4
Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2012 10:27 pm

Re: Really confused

Postby sadsloth » Fri May 04, 2012 9:41 pm

Dear Barbara,
I haven't really been back on the site for a while - but so sad to hear how things are for you and your husband. I hope that it picks up for you soon. Thinking of you,
S