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Stephen's Story


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Hello all my forum friends,

I thought you may be interested in how I was getting on.

I have just been re-reading your lovely comments made when Stephen first died and once again they bring tears to my eyes, not because of why they were written but because of the genuine empathy and concern they display. I can't thank everyone enough for their support.

So, I embarked on the paperwork marathon once the funeral was over (what a boon Tell Us Once is) and now have just come back from a week's fly and flop in Cyprus, on my own. A couple of people said "how brave of you to go away alone" and there were moments when I thought I had made a mistake, especially when I was moved from the first disastrous hotel to a 5* all suite one in Paphos. On the first night, when I sat down at my table for two and looked at all the couples around me I felt so alone and sad, especially when the waitress removed the surplus place setting. However it got easier after that. I spent the days looking at the sea, relaxing, reading and eating lovely food. I could have wished to have slept better but you can't have everything.

Now I am home sorting out the washing, getting back to the post which has built up, and thinking about visiting my son and family in Portugal for my birthday next month. I am refusing to make any real decisions and not looking too far ahead.

In the days before I went on holiday I defrosted the kitchen freezer and the big one in the garage and threw away some stuff (my sons laugh at me for insisting food is perfectly fine when it's past its best before date). That's something that had been on my mind. Next job, sorting out all the many drawers in the kitchen. Mind you, with me that usually means putting most of it back!

Love to you all on this horrible journey.

Sandie xx

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  • sandraW


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  • Sandiemac


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You're a star Sandiemac, and well done for Going Alone. The secret is to take a book or a Kindle into the dining room with you. It takes up the extra space at the table, and it means you don't have to look round the room at couples while you're eating. In these days of Liberated Ladies a solitary woman is no longer regarded with suspicion (or worse) by fellow travellers.

You sound as though you Have a Plan and that's a good way to be. I hope you go to Portugal next month - always good to have something nice on the horizon - and that you are being good to yourself. Good luck with rearranging the kitchen drawers though - I try quite hard not to collect gadgets (just why does anybody need a pineapple corer ? We're not exactly knee-deep in pineapples, are we ?) a few always slip through, as well as elastic bands and skewers.

Of course we are interested in how you are getting on, and it's nice to have you back - even if you decide to move on it's good to know that you are feeling positive and that you've taken a break away from the nitty gritty back home.

Take care my love,


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Dear Sandie

As Mo says, it sounds like you are finding your way on this really hard stretch of the horrible journey. Thank you for updating us, I've been thinking of you and hoping that you've been ok.

Much love

W&M xx

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