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Marmalade

Re: Hello

Postby Marmalade » Tue Jun 27, 2017 5:27 pm

Hi Vee,

Couldn't agree more with Veema, we have all done what you are doing and will probably do so again and again but there is no future in it. All any of us can do is our best, you did that, cared and made suggestions but then you allowed Allan to make his decisions and supported him in doing what he wanted which is the humane and loving thing to do.

God bless you Vee and give you strength and courage, be sure that we continue to walk with you

Marmalade xx

Dandygal76
Posts: 737
Joined: Sat Mar 12, 2016 9:49 am

Re: Hello

Postby Dandygal76 » Wed Jun 28, 2017 10:57 pm

Vee - I am so sorry you lost Allan to this dreadful illness. Please do not beat yourself up, we all did the best we could at the time with what we knew at the time. Hindsight is never an answer. My dad was the same.. he would not pay for that pesky MRI much earlier or take other routes because he believed in the NHS. I had to fight dad for so many things and did not even bother to get him to do an early MRI with his markers rising because I knew he would say the scan is only in 4 weeks and let us see what that says. They are their own people and we cannot make decisions for them.. we can only suggest what we think is best. What you should take comfort in is that once symptoms appear it is already too late for most and so the chances are your wanting of the second opinion would not have mattered or made a difference.

What I do know is that our loved ones would not want us to beat ourselves up, the past cannot be changed but you still have your future generations that I am sure Allan would want you to concentrate on now. I know that is easier said that done but you did him proud in your efforts for him and you will continue to do him proud carrying on his legacy.

It is bloody hard I know, but we can all only work with what we have and form the future hence forth. Allan will be in your heart forever helping you to do that. You did him proud. x

Veebee
Posts: 93
Joined: Thu Feb 16, 2017 4:31 pm

Re: Hello

Postby Veebee » Tue Jul 04, 2017 9:23 am

Hello again ....Allan's funeral is this afternoon and I'm counting the minutes and trying to calm my nerves. I'm dreading the hearse arriving and yet, I want it to be over. The last couple of weeks have been busy and today is the culmination of our preparations. The house is quiet for now and I'm just waiting and gathering my thoughts before family arrive. I didn't want to get up today and felt as if I wanted to stay in bed. You will understand my feelings I'm certain. Speak soon.

Love Vee xxxx

Sandiemac
Posts: 67
Joined: Tue May 10, 2016 10:27 am

Re: Hello

Postby Sandiemac » Tue Jul 04, 2017 10:53 am

Thinking of you and wishing you strength. I hope everything goes as you would wish and that you end the day feeling you have done him proud.

Proud Wife
Posts: 727
Joined: Sun Jan 17, 2016 9:28 am

Re: Hello

Postby Proud Wife » Tue Jul 04, 2017 12:08 pm

I'm not saying it was the right thing to do but I had a Bacardi before my hubby's funeral. I am not a drinker but it just took the edge off. I know exactly how you feel. The hearse arriving is one of the hardest parts as is that final goodbye. You will get through it my lovely. And I hope that by tonight, you can feel you did everything possible to give Allan the best possible send off.

Think of you xxx

Veema
Posts: 475
Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2015 5:35 pm

Re: Hello

Postby Veema » Tue Jul 04, 2017 7:00 pm

Hope today has been a little better than you were expecting Vee...I'm sure you did Allan proud and gave him a good send off.

Huge hugs...

Vx