A forum for family, friends and carers of pancreatic cancer patients

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skating76
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:42 am

Is my mum close to th end?

Postby skating76 » Tue Apr 08, 2014 7:52 pm

My mum was only diagnosed a few weeks ago but has been unwell since September.

She is now asleep the majority of the time and when she is awake it's only for a few minutes and she just responds with single answers, not really 'with it'. She is very yellow, on anti sickness medication and morphine patches etc. The nurses come and visit most days.

I just need to know if she is close to the end or if this is one of a number of stages to come.

I feel as though I've lost her already.

Skater

Fifi

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby Fifi » Tue Apr 08, 2014 7:59 pm

Welcome to the forum. Hope you find some comfort here.

Could you please tell us a bit more if you are able to? Do you know what stage your mum is at? Is she able to have any treatment?

I am sorry for what you are going through. I know how hard it is to see a parent like this. Please try to keep posting, from my own experience, I feel it helps to know you are not alone.

xx

skating76
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:42 am

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby skating76 » Tue Apr 08, 2014 8:16 pm

My mum was only diagnosed a few weeks ago and was told she had pancreatic cancer which had spread to her liver. It took sometime to diagnose because my parents had just moved from the Midlands, where she had visited the doctors who told her it was reflux. When she visited her new GP he sent her for a scan and was diagnosed.
My mum has refused any treatment and not attended any specialist appointments. Chemotherapy was offered but my mum was not interested.
Because of this I don't know exactly what type of pancreatic cancer she has or what stage.
She has gone rapidly downhill over the last few days.

Fifi

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby Fifi » Tue Apr 08, 2014 8:50 pm

That sounds very tough on you, to know your mum doesn't want treatment. Has she been given a timescale? Does she have a Macmillan nurse?

xx

sandraW
Posts: 1039
Joined: Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:38 pm

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby sandraW » Tue Apr 08, 2014 8:54 pm

I am so sorry to hear about your mum, it is such a wicked disease, and difficult to diagnose it would seem. Can you have a word with the nurses while they are visiting your mum and see if they can give you any information. Its so difficult for you I am sure but just try and support you mum in her decision whatever she finally decides, take care sandrax

skating76
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:42 am

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby skating76 » Tue Apr 08, 2014 9:02 pm

The hospice nurses come regularly and have been fantastic, she is not in any pain anymore.

The doctor visited a few weeks ago and said she had weeks but this is just his opinion which could be wrong.

She hasn't eaten much for months but is still eating a little. Half a bowl of cereal a day.

It's only over the last few days she has been asleep all the time is this a normal stage/symptom? and not knowing what day it is etc

Fifi

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby Fifi » Tue Apr 08, 2014 9:08 pm

I can't answer your question, as I haven't experienced that stage. I can't imagine how you must be feeling. Is your mum able to speak? Can she tell you things?

Others on here may be able to answer your question. There are also 2 specialist nurses called Jeni and Dianne. You could give them a call or email them. They will be able to help and advise you.

xx

PCUK Nurse Dianne
Posts: 284
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2012 3:29 pm

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby PCUK Nurse Dianne » Thu Apr 10, 2014 10:02 am

Hi Skating,

As Fifi has mentioned, please do feel free to be in contact with us on the support line (support@pancreaticcancer.org.uk) or phone (020 3535 7099) and we can either talk to you or answer your email questions.

Of course you also have the support of this wonderful forum family who will also be able to give your their experiences which is so valuable. Do feel free to be in contact if we can help you.

Dianne
Specialist Pancreatic Cancer Nurse
Support Team

janem
Posts: 29
Joined: Fri Nov 01, 2013 10:45 pm

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby janem » Thu Apr 10, 2014 6:44 pm

Hi Skating
I don't want to upset you and this is just my experience. My dad deteriorated in the last 2 weeks he was only eating a small portion of porridge in the morning and in the last 6 days didn't eat at all. All I can say is trust your instincts I hoped I was wrong and looking on the dark side but my gut instinct was accurate, just try to be there for her. The last three days I took off work and just sat in my dads front room reading and checking on him in his bedroom regularly. The last day though I just stayed in the bedroom with him.
Hopefully you have a few weeks to enjoy, my heart goes out to you, only you know what is the right thing to do.
Sending lots of cyber hugs
Nikki

skating76
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:42 am

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby skating76 » Sun Apr 13, 2014 6:25 pm

Thank you Nikki, I know everyone is different but it is good to get some idea.
Mum hasn't eaten anything for the past two days and is asleep all the time, although any noise or anything wakes her up so she is not properly asleep.
I have taken the week off work next week so it is easier and don't have to feel as though I am juggling everything.

skating76
Posts: 5
Joined: Thu Mar 27, 2014 11:42 am

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby skating76 » Thu Apr 17, 2014 3:11 pm

My mum had a stent fitted yesterday and nearly 24hours after the op she seems a little better for it. She is still very tired and weak but not feeling as sick. Hopefully tomorrow she'll feel a little better again and regain some of her appetite.

sandraW
Posts: 1039
Joined: Thu Oct 31, 2013 5:38 pm

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby sandraW » Thu Apr 17, 2014 10:47 pm

That's better news, I hope your mum continues to improve. take care sandrax

Cathy
Posts: 788
Joined: Fri Mar 15, 2013 5:43 pm

Re: Is my mum close to th end?

Postby Cathy » Fri Apr 18, 2014 5:46 pm

Hi

Glad to hear your Mum has perked up a little. Everything crossed for you.

Cathy Xxx